Jan
Bittersweet.
Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments »I was lucky enough to make it to Pennsylvania to spend some time with my grandpa before he passed away. I travelled all day Sunday. First I flew from Reno to Chicago-Midway. I had a layover in Chicago-Midway so I watched the playoff games. (And became saddened that my Chargers didn’t make it into the championship.) The flight from Reno to Chicago was long, but it wasn’t too unbearable. I sat next to a fellow who was a coach for a football team from Chicago. (As a matter of fact, their whole team was on the flight, haha.) He was kinda.. buff in the arms so I sat off to the side most of the flight. It made for a slightly uncomfortable backache. We ended up with a delay– which in a sense was kinda a blessing cause everyone got to watch the end of the game before we boarded. I expected turbulence landing in Philadelphia as they were having a small rain storm. Let me tell you what– Leila is NOT a fan. I actually felt my first kick to the ribs because of it! (Though I didn’t realize that was what had happened till a couple days later when it happened again.) I got picked up from the airport by my cousin Jamie and my cousin Kevin’s fiance Ashley. I was exhausted, but I agreed to go out to a local diner with them. They bought me food and gave me presents for Leila. It was a very sweet gesture. My cousin Jamie got a journal for the first 3 years of Leila’s life. It’s really cute, I’ve already started on it. And my aunt, uncle, cousin Kevin, & Ashley got me some picture frames, a cute sweater, a pack of onesies, and a Winnie the Pooh water temperature tester. It was very nice. Once I finally made it to my cousin Amanda’s place, I passed out and slept in. It was so nice finally getting to sleep. (I think I ended up at her apartment at like 3 am! >.<) When I woke up, I got ready and went to see my pappy.
It was weird seeing him in the state he was in. I mean, when I last saw him, he was full of life. And when I got to the rehab center, he didn't talk much at all. It'd been awhile since he'd seen me last so he didn't recognize me, either. I spent a couple hours there with him, then went back with my grandma to her house. We went back a few hours later. I spent every day up there with my Pappy. Even if it was just a few minutes that I got to spend with him. And every day I'd tell him "I'll be back here tomorrow to see you Pappy." Every day, I came back.
I got to spend a lot of time with my Grammy. Before going up there, I'll be honest, I didn't really know much about her. I cant write a book now based on my knowledge, but I can tell you that she is one hell of a woman. She's incredibly strong willed, and just an amazing woman. I really look up to her. She was so strong sitting there with my Pappy. If it were me, I'd probably be bawling my eyes out. I had a wonderful time with her.
I did spend some time with my cousin Amanda (who will now be referred to as AJo). AJo and I have always been pretty close growing up, and so when I decided I was going to go up there to visit.. I knew I'd be crashing on her couch. It was really nice spending time with her. She's a really awesome girl and I count her among one of my closest friend's. I love her to pieces.
It was actually in AJo's apartment that I figured out what the kick in the ribs was. I was in the shower and felt this dull pain right outside of my ribs. I started to rub it with my fingers and felt.. something. It felt like an elbow or a heel. As I rubbed it down, it went away and then my entire belly started to move. It was incredible. I was so excited I couldn't wait to tell Jim and my mom what I'd felt.
On Thursday, my final night in Pennsylvania, my Uncle Kenny and Aunt Lisa took me out to dinner. We went to On the Border with my little cousin Kaylyn (whom I haven't seen since she was like, 3 years old.) She's 12 now and in 6th grade. It was nice spending time with them again. After dinner, I asked my Uncle Kenny if he could take me to see my Pappy since I hadn't had a chance to yet. He took me over there and let me have some alone time with Pappy-- which I had not had chance to do. I really appreciated having that time with my Pappy.
I had to tell my Pappy that I wouldn't be able to come back to see him anymore because I had to fly back to Nevada the next day. I had a message from my brother that I relayed to him and I told him how much he meant to me. I spent some time just sitting there with him with my hand on his shoulder. I told him how much I knew my Dad and Mom wanted to be there. And how much my brother wished he could be there, as well. I told him how every time I got close to him, Leila would kick me. Then I gave him a kiss from everyone-- from me, Leila, my brother, my mom and my dad. I told him I loved him. And then I left.
My uncle dropped my off at my Grammy's so I could say goodbye to them. They had two cards waiting there for me. One was a wedding card and another was a baby card. They both had gift cards in them. I was floored. I stayed with my Uncle Kenny that night as he was to be my ride to the airport the next morning. He got a phone call a little after 4 am letting him know my Pappy had passed away. I got the news a little after I'd woken up. Let me tell you what.. travelling on news like that sucked. I'm not one to cry in public places.. so I held it in. I cried a little bit throughout the day, but I didn't properly get to deal with it like I wanted to. Hell, I still haven't. I couldn't cry at all on Saturday. I finally cried yesterday. I want to just cry and cry but I hate crying and making people feel weird about it. I dont know.
Oh, I suppose before I close up I should let you know about my last appointment. The appointments aren't as exciting as before anymore, haha. Now that I have the doppler at my house and I can hear Leila's heartbeat whenever I want, the appointments aren't anything special. Everything was measuring good at the appointment, though. My uterus was measuring right around where I should be. Her heartbeat was strong and yeah. Everything was good. My next appointment is on February 3rd. I do my glucose test and then get my rhogam shot. And after that.. my appointments are every two weeks. That's just crazy to me! This pregnancy is going by so fast, I swear!
Here's a picture of my belly from yesterday-- so I was 27 weeks, 3 days.
Jim and I went to the store last night and used up one of the giftcards. That wasn’t intentional, but I just couldn’t say no to Jim. He was so cute walking up and down the aisles getting excited for baby stuff. Here was our loot– minus a big box of wipes and a box of diapers.
Well, I suppose thats it for now. If any of my family up in Pennsylvania is reading this, thank you so much for your hospitality while I was up there.